When I sobered up through AA, I knew it was God's doing. He led me to AA, AA helped lead me back to God. I saw Him in a new light and He turned the Lights on for me to see His loving hands guiding me, and protecting me throughout my life.
Epiphanies came often through recovery meetings. My views on religion were shattered. I suddenly had clarity and a truer view of life's meanings. I had wants and needs lifelong that brought everything but happiness. Thought's like; If only I had money, if only I was born into wealth, if only she was my woman, if only....
Nothing satisfied. What I needed, I did not want. What I wanted, I thought I needed. As time passed and I acquired things, went places, and became friends with those who might boost my name and reputation, emptiness resulted. I ended up broken, divorced, and a daily drunk, grasping for more, needing and wanting the truth to show up. That truth I sought was that I was right. I was an empty shell that arrogantly knew better than everyone else. How foolish.
Epiphany That Removed The Scales From My Eyes
In recovery, you hear a lot of crazy things. You also hear God speak through others. My moment of clarity came in a meeting one day, crushing my beliefs, my supposed needs, and selfish wants. It may have been an AA member speaking, but it was Jesus' words screaming at me:
..."let the greater among you become like the younger, and the one who rules
like the one who serves...I am among you as one who serves." Luke 22:26-27
Did I want joy, peace, and love? No, I needed them. Did I want to know my purpose in life? I needed to know, I needed to know that my previous thoughts of purpose was twisted as well. Did I want to know my life, in the end, was not a total waste? NO, I had to know.
If I want purpose, and the benefits of love, joy, and peace that accompany, I had to go second in life, everyone else go first...I had to serve.
Here was real life, total satisfaction, a path leading to the Master Servant's mysteries, secrets known but hidden. Pointing others to find their need to know how to want the real Truth is all I will ever need, all I want....hang the rest.
I hope my thoughts here are helpful to you. I hope you discover it is about you, how you see life through people, places, and things. The Greatest Servant who ever lived, died, and rose bodily from the dead, still serves as your personal attorney, thwarting the accusations from the evil one. Look at what you want and need. If you want and need to know your purpose with all of the perks, retain Christ Jesus as your lawyer. He will work out the details.
Shalom to all.