There is a time for everything. The ability to be aware of the need to change with the ebb and flow is a spiritual matter, I really believe. One day everything is going perfectly well, I sense this feeling so intensely that I am convinced nothing will ever go wrong again, I have finally figured out how to stay in this particular frame of existence. The next day I wonder what happened, how did I lose this mountain top experience? There are also days so full of things needing to be accomplished that I seem not to care what frame of emotion I am sensing, or how I am spiritually.
This is the most dangerous "place" to be. The continuous onslaught of items needing attention, fills me to the gills, and where I suffer the most is in my relationship to God. Second to suffering in that, the most important of relationships, comes the relationship to my wife, then my children, and eventually, every relationship I treasure takes it "on the chin." Here, in this most dangerous of places, things quickly fall apart, and I'm left wondering, what do I do now? This is the time to review and re-focus.
"To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven. A time to be born and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to reap; a time to kill, a time to heal; a time to break down, a time to build up; a time to weep, a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance." Eccl. 3:1-4
I am grateful that I have the understanding, that when the controversial winds blow, in times of heavy trials, and fear...these will all pass. This is an awareness I experience from the indwelling presence of God, to cause me to see that I'm out of balance. You all know what I mean, it is like having one tire that's bad on your vehicle...it is very annoying, and you get to the point you want to stop driving until it is fixed. I need to re-balance, review, re-focus, and where I begin is with the main relationship, with God. When that is repaired, the others follow smoothly. God graciously cause me to see the time to change, surrender my will and my life to Him, to relinquish my control.
This is my address today, rather this moment. I have really experienced some heavy-duty doubt, frustration, some real emotions of dysfunction, am I where I need to be? What should I be doing today? There is a place I know to go, my hiding place. It is hidden so well, I nearly forgot where it was myself! I will tell you all where it is...it is in the Rock, not Alcatraz, the One Rock that Lives and never changes.
"For in the time of trouble He shall hide me in His pavillion, in the secret place of His tabernacle He shall hide me; He shall set me high upon a rock." Ps. 27: 5
I have had many challenges of late. The book business has dominated my waking moments, the thing I am to be doing is self-promoting, getting the book into the attention of my sphere of influence, and the people I know. Then when August 28th rolls around, the book will have already had some play, and hopefully word of mouth will help the national release be even more successful. The publisher has quite a bit of money invested in this project, and desire to re-coup their investment and much more. They would love it to be a #1 best seller. I have really struggled with placing the book on my sites, on twitter, facebook, etc, concerned that people may think I'm prideful and have no humility.
You may not believe this, but some people duck and run, thinking I am going to bug them about buying the book, or talk about it incessantly. There is another factor, there is a number of people that are actually jealous, and do not regard this as an achievement I should be proud of...really? The people closest to me never mention the book, I feel at times like I have a plague or something! But then, God reminds me of the purpose. The book is written to help the struggling alcoholic/addict that follows Christ, stay clean and sober through their focus on Him. My times of riding the emotional roller coaster, fearing what you think, real or imagined, is put away so that I can return to doing what pleases Him, and gives me purpose, that is helping others. I have to remember that there is a time, a purpose for everything. How I feel or what you think will change with the time.
Thanks for reading, God bless and keep you all.